The 3 Phases of Limerence (Being Madly in Love)
When Dr. Tennov introduced the concept in the 1970s, it was mostly rejected. We encounter marriage counselors who have never heard of it. But the research is solid. PhD’s including anthropologists and biologists and more study it, even having brain scans that teach us much about it.
It’s called limerence. It is a state of being “madly in love’ to the point that it becomes obsessive and affects the way a person feels, acts, and thinks. It is powerful. It can be beautiful. It often is destructive.
If you search the internet for the word, you’ll find many sites discussing it. Unfortunately, some of those are by people who read an article or two – maybe even Tennov’s book from back in the day – and think themselves knowledgeable. Some confidently cite things about limerence that Tennov said that we now know by further research not to be the case. Therefore, be careful with what you read on the internet about it. It may lead you to some very wrong conclusions…and those to very wrong actions.
Our knowledge of limerence comes not only from continuing to examine scholarly research, but from the hundreds of thousands of people who have been through workshops, courses, and seminars developed by Dr. Joe Beam. We carefully observe people in our 911 workshops for marriages in crisis who are in limerence. We have done before and after scientific profiles on many. We have in-depth dialogue with others. We have found that limerence has three phases……and that limerence ends……always.
In this program, Dr. Beam discusses the three phases of limerence. He explains what happens within the limerent during each. He explains shy some who end limerence don’t go back to their lives as before…and how to help overcome limerence.
ALSO SEE: What is Limerence?
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